Employment, Football and Week 2 Picks

So, a lot has happened in the nearly two months since my last post. Most of these things have contributed to my not writing and some may just get me divorced. Let’s get to it:

Gainful Employment – Yes, that’s correct, there are jobs out there and I got one of the four that were available in the country. Don’t worry, if you’ve been laid off, you too can earn 25 to 50 percent less than you made a year ago.

Baseball Season – Thank God it’s ending. Seattle fans are so painfully in denial about how bad this team is, they were assigning moral victories to late-season trades. This season reminds me a lot of the 1991 team that finished over .500 for the first time in franchise history and everyone was high-fiving each other. Except for manager Jim Lefebvre. He got canned. I don’t want moral victories for small improvements. I want a ******* World Series. Enough already.

Washington Football – Speaking of moral victories, the Dawgs hung in there with LSU to start the college football season and then beat on a weaker Idaho team. And good for them. Eventually, the Athletic Department will stop scheduling BCS Top 10 opponents to start the season and let the kids kick the hell out of some smaller schools so the team isn’t starting the season 1-4 or 0-3. By the way, if gambling were legal, I’d be pounding Washington -20 at home against USC. I smell a giant letdown after the Trojans beat Ohio State on the road. There was lots of hype, lots of energy, and lots of ESPN interviews and behind the scenes features leading up to that game for USC. There will be none of that crap this week and they’ll come out flat in Seattle. They’ll win, but won’t cover. Banging Washington and taking the points.

Seahawks Season Opener - I took the wife to the Seahawks season opener. Enough said. Actually, one more thing. Is anyone else concerned that Matt Hasselbeck couldn’t throw the ball downfield unless it was into double or triple coverage? I’m hoping it’s rust since he hadn’t played in a meaningful game in almost a year and hadn’t really played in a game in nearly three weeks.

NFL Week 1 – There were plenty of WTF moments in week 1. Neither the Pats nor Bolts cover, but both eek out wins. New England’s defense looked porous at best. San Diego is looking like the Seahawks from a year ago. Instead of listing who is injured on offense, the Chargers should just tell us who isn’t and we’ll go from there. Houston, who I thought was a super dark horse to do big things in the post season threw up all over themselves and got whooped by a rookie quarterback, making his first start on the road. Maybe Mark Sanchez is the real deal. I’m not buying yet. The supposed stout Baltimore defense gives up 24 points at home to the Chiefs who were playing without Matt Cassel. Backup Brodie Croyle posts a 116.1 passer rating.

NFL Week 2
Here are my picks and sometimes thoughtful reasoning:

New England (-4) at New York Jets – Maybe I’m stuck in 2008, but I just don’t see Bill Belichick allowing the Patriots to not bounce back in a big way. Tom Brady looked not so great in the first half Monday night, but he gained his rhythm back in the second half and the defense seemed to figure things out a little bit. I’m not jumping on the Sanchez bandwagon yet and I’m not buying the Rex Ryan is a genius thing either, just like I didn’t buy the Man-genius hype. I’m taking New England.

Baltimore (+3) at San Diego – Baltimore is 1-4 against the spread in the last five on the road at San Diego. They had a hard time with the Kansas City offense last week at home. So, why wouldn’t you take Baltimore straight up, right? That and the Bolts are banged up and feel a shame spiral manifesting since they didn’t blow out Oakland on Monday night.

Houston (+7) at Tennessee – Titans running back Chris Johnson will go off, there’s no way he repeats a 57-yard rushing day. And Tennessee seemed to quiet down the talk of a rough life after Albert Haynesworth. Taking Tennessee -7.

Cincinnati (+9) at Green Bay – Green Bay fans want to see Aaron Rogers open it up and the Packers want to prove they are for real after sputtering to a win over the Bears. Beating the Bengals won’t do anything to help announce their arrival, but a healthy ass kicking would be a show of good faith.

Carolina (+6) at Atlanta – Jake Delhomme is shell shocked and they can’t run the ball. The Panthers had seven turnovers last week, Delhomme is probably on a short leash and they’re going into Atlanta who has a running back in Michael Turner who is due. Love Atlanta to win big.

Seattle (+1.5) at San Francisco – Homer pick. San Francisco continues to pat themselves on the back for beating the NFC champs at home the week prior. Meanwhile the Seahawks do just enough to squeak out a late field goal to win. Seahawks +1.5.

Minnesota (-10) at Detroit – Adrian Peterson is real good. Detroit is real bad. Minnie -10.

St. Louis (+9.5) at Washington – St. Louis committed so many knucklehead penalties in Seattle last week and Marc Bulger had the swagger of Jake Delhomme. The Rams are 3-6 ATS on the road at Washington and 3-7 ATS in last 10 games. Washington at home -9.5.

Arizona (+3) at Jacksonville – There is nothing I like about this game. I have no idea what AZ is, but I know they aren’t very good, like most West Coast teams, when they head to the East Coast. Jags for no real good reason -3.

Oakland (+3) at Kansas City – It sounds like Matt Cassel will be back for this game and the Raiders are still the Raiders. Unless Raiders coach Tom Cable can take an early flight and bust the jaws of two thirds of the team, KC wins -3.

Tampa Bay (+5) at Buffalo – Tampa Bay is a mess. Trent Edwards looks like he can move the ball for Buffalo and T.O. hasn’t lost his ****. Yet. Buffalo -5.

Cleveland (+3) at Denver – I’m taking Clevland and Brady Quinn looked ayight. Except for getting sacked five times. Just can’t go with Denver.

Pittsburgh (-3) at Chicago – When Brian Urlacher doesn’t play, the Bears don’t win. That’s enough for me. Pittsburgh -3.

New York Giants (+3) at Dallas – The Giants cover and Cowboys don’t. Everyone goes gaga over Dallas’ new home and New York thanks everyone for the win and the comfy accommodations while they were in town. NYG +3.

Indianapolis (-3) at Miami – Taking the home dog Miami in a must win for them before they have to travel to San Diego. A 0-3 start would be an early season death knell. Miami +3.