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New York Jets (The J-E-T Press)

Found August 11, 2008 on J-E-T Press:
PLAYERS: Brett Favre,  Dustin Keller,  Chansi Stuckey,  Bryan Thomas,  Jerricho Cotchery,  Kris Jenkins,  Vernon Gholston,  Darrelle Revis,  Eric Smith,  Dwight Lowery,  Trent Edwards,  Ricky Williams
TEAMS: New York Jets,  Miami Dolphins

Team MVP: Brett Favre (He has to be for obvious reasons) Break-Out Player: Obvious name dept: Dustin Keller. Incognito: Chansi Stuckey. Biggest Disappointment: Bryan Thomas (First a wasted draft pick then a wasted extension) Fantasy Stud: Jerricho Cotchery. Offensive Outlook: Much improved running game (all around) thanks to Amped up blocking and Bill Callahan. Much improved passing game thanks to Brett Favre. Defensive Diagnosis: The 3-4 will finally arrive. Kris Jenkins will be a monster and Vernon Gholston will grow into one by the end of the season. The surprise will be the improved play of the secondary especially Darrelle Revis, Eric Smith and newbie Dwight Lowery. "Red Letter" Game: All of them but now playing the Dolphins twice is more bittersweet. Projected Record/Outlook: 11-5 and we are going to the Super Bowl. After that anything is possible. Parting Smack: The Buffalo Bills fans and prognosticators are in for a very rude awakening because they ain't that good. Two words: Trent Edwards. New England Patriots: I think they suck for the obvious reason that they are admitted cheaters. I don't know why they stopped cheating with two minutes left to go in the season last year but that ruined their perfect season. How can anyone that doesn't have clam chowder flowing through their veins root for this team and Bill Belichick - the most evil man in America? Miami Dolphins: They suck, well, because they do. 1-15 is no accident or bad breaks. They are also run by another very evil man, Bill Parcells. Although I love him for his hardcore approach and his rejuvenation of the Jets, he is still very, very evil. You also cannot root for a pothead like Ricky Williams. He's so not cool. Sorry Chad. The Buffalo Bills: They suck because they have become the New York Jets and started to believe some of the press and hype about them. The Jets did that after 1998 and look what happened. We even did it after Herm and after Mangini got us to 10-6. Buffalo just flat out sucks because they have no QB and it is too cold their. Also, the only thing to come out of Buffalo of any import are hot wings. Big deal. - Jason Versaggi
Original Story: http://thejetpress.com/
9 Comments:
  • There's 2 minutes of my life I'll never get back... You on the debate team in High School, buddy? "They suck because they do" "why they stopped cheating with two minutes left to go in the season last year ".
    I am impressed you can actually type!
    Favre will break you tiny little heart with 2 minutes to go.
    by Yankeeboy   August 12, 2008   Reply   Options  
  • Wow. You are a regular Nostradumbass.
    by aabbaab   August 12, 2008   Reply   Options  
  • Insightful comments, fellas.
    by ArrowheadAdam   August 12, 2008   Reply   Options   +1 Likes
  • Honestly, I knew Jets fans couldn't read, but I didn't realize they couldn't writer either.
    by Phinphanatic   August 12, 2008   Reply   Options   +1 Likes
  • If you're going to clown on someone's writing, you should at least check the sentence for errors. C'mon, Dolphins!
    by ArrowheadAdam   August 12, 2008   Reply   Options   +1 Likes
  • J-E-T-S Jets Jets Jets!! F-A-V-R-E Favre Favre Favre. Nah, just doesn't sound the same. At least you have two wins vs. Miami and will probably beat Arizona in a game the Cards should win.
    by AZScott   August 12, 2008   Reply   Options   +1 Likes
  • Using "should" and "the Cards" without "lose" just isn't right. Yes, I'm ready for this Saturday's game.
    by ArrowheadAdam   August 12, 2008   Reply   Options   +1 Likes
  • Now back to blasting the Jets. I heard McCain was looking for a running mate his own age. Maybe Brett could help him deliver the Empire State and Jersey?
    by ArrowheadAdam   August 12, 2008   Reply   Options   +1 Likes
  • This is the worst write-up of the bunch. Please don't ask Jason back next year.
    by fossfan   August 13, 2008   Reply   Options  
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