Tom Brady Career is Over...Because of Gisele Bundchen

If you have been following me on Twitter (http://www.twitter.com/BlkSportsOnline) you know this article is way past due, but better late than never, so let's get to it. It all started with Adam, no not Adam Vinatieri, but the original Adam that we were all spawned from. Adam had a good life. He was chilling playing spades with God, fishing all day, racing the bunnies and what not. But because they didn't have Xbox360s and the internet back then Adam became bored. So he went to God and was like: "Pops you need to hook a brother up because I am tired of playing with these rabbits and elephants" God whose "Pimp Focus" is always on point was like: "You know something Adam you are my first born so I am going to hook you up with the original Supermodel and all I ask is you see that tree over there. Just stay away from it. It has some hood rats in it and I don't want you to be corrupted." Adam agreed, he got the first Supermodel and her name was Eve. Eve was fine so her and Adam were playing "Bed Gammon" constantly and in the beginning it was pretty clear that Adam was the "big dog" of the relationship. But then Eve started something that women would do for the next million years. She started to nag. Eve wanted to go to the "hood". She wanted to hang out by the "gangster" tree. Adam was like: "Nawwwwwwwwwwwwwwww we good." But then Eve whisper something in Adam's ear about strawberries, a rope and some ML (if you can't figure it out my bad it is a family site). Next thing you know Adam was chomping on apples and our ability to walk around naked was forever lost. What does this all have to do with Tom Brady?