Originally posted on The Sports Bank  |  Last updated 12/28/11

Want to be a balla, shot-calla, 20″ rims on your Impala?

Well I can’t promise you a way to that, but if you go packersowner.com and you have $250 to burn (plus the $25 handling fee) you can become a bonafide NFL owner. That’s right, you’d own a share of the Green Bay Packers, the league’s only publicly traded team.

Other than the juice I listed above, you get voting rights, the chance to attend a shareholder’s meeting, tour the Packers Hall of Fame, and meet team executives.

Of course, these stock shares have no dividend, no ROI, no compounding interest, and no real chance at capital gain as they have no resale value. Yet they’re selling at a rate that would make hotcakes jealous.

From the AP:

The team has had four other stock offerings. Sales in 1923, 1935 and 1950 helped keep the Packers afloat at a time when other small-market teams were struggling to survive.

The most recent sale was in 1997. The team offered 400,000 shares for $200 apiece, but only about 120,000 shares were sold.

The team initially offered 250,000 shares starting December 6th, but sales moved quickly and they decided to put another 30,000 on the market. I’M SERIOUSLY considering this.

And just think I could change my Twitter bio to include “part owner of a NFL franchise”

And with the Sports Bank constantly writing about the Packers, a team it partially owns, we could be just like the Blackhawks! Who have their games broadcast on Comcast who partially owns them, with all the delicious conflicts of interest. We could be swimming with the big fish.

Not to mention my ass in Green Bay for a shareholders meeting? Think of the story possibilities! Sales end Feb 29th, or whenever shares are sold out. The money raised will go to a Lambeau Field renovation.

And there’s another way my potential $250 could end up paying for itself. I’ve had the most NEGATIVE experiences possible as a journalist, ticket buyer and fan of the Chicago Bears. If I could save the life of one person, and the other one wouldn’t be allowed to live, and my two choices were someone in a.) Chicago Bears Media Relations or b.) Al Qaeda, I’m picking the member of the terrorist cell each time. And going to the game with tickets instead of credentials is no better because I’ve had to endure retarded gorillas beating on each other in my section each time I’ve been to a game.

Over time this has built up some bitterness towards the Bears, and it doesn’t help that I live in Chicago where people DO NOT SHUT THE EFF UP ABOUT THE BEARS ALL THE EFFING TIME.

There I admitted it, I run a Chicago sports website, and I cannot stand the Chicago Bears. Well, ripping on them is a lot of fun, and it is fun to listen to other people criticize that pathetic organization from top to bottom. Nevertheless, I think buying ownership shares in their bitter rival would likely put my Bears bitterness to bed where it belongs.

Paul M. Banks is CEO of The Sports Bank.net, an official Google News site generating millions of unique visitors. He’s also a regular contributor to Chicago Now, Walter Football.com, Yardbarker, and Fox Sports

A Fulbright scholar and MBA, Banks has appeared on live radio all over the world; and he’s a member of the Football Writers Association of America, U.S. Basketball Writers Association, and Society of Professional Journalists. The President of the United States follows him on Twitter (@Paul_M_BanksTSB) You should too.

 

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