Originally written on Ballertainment  |  Last updated 8/8/12

Ballertainment

Hard Knocks, Training Camp With The Miami Dolphins

The Miami Dolphins are this years darlings of the critically acclaimed series, HBO Hard Knocks.

The first episode began with the bitter pill of right guard and former New England Patriot, Derek Dennis, being cut from the team. Cuts are par for the course during NFL training camp, but the sting of it never lessens. Damn, if it doesn’t hurt just to watch.

The team’s quarterbacks and their families were introduced — Matt More, former Jaguar David Gerrard, and rookie first-rounder, Ryan Tannehill, who reported to camp late due to a contract holdout are in competition to lead the team. Their battle is sure to be an ongoing feature of the series, but veteran Gerrard got the nod as the starter for camp.

The Dolphins players stay in a hotel for camp (some teams accommodations are college dorms) and after checking in, a few of the guys decided to spot-bleach their hair, resulting in them looking like a pack of cheetahs. Second-year lineman Mike Pouncey got in on the pre-camp grooming action too, at home, with a visit from his personal barber, although I’m not sure we needed to see him get his nose hair clipped.

Enter, Chad Johnson…… and his wife, Evelyn (Lozada) Johnson. Its clear they will provide a huge chunk of the entertainment this season, especially after this exchange:

Ev: “What are you thinking? About how gorgeous I am?”
Chad: “You really not all that.”
Chad: “Everybody’s decent in their own way….”
Ev: “Right…”
Chad: “…but then you got money, so I married you for that also.”

The filter is off for them both in this episode, especially for Chad and his colorful, sharp tongue, but head coach, Joe Philbin, quickly let him know, man to man, that he needed to chill — the f-bombs are too much. He dropped the name Ochocinco, but it might take a minute for him to drop all that came with it.

Cornerback Vontae Davis, might not make it, though. Who goes around the sidelines telling his teammates that he’s tired, and that he intends to “ack” like he isn’t? Vontae. Good luck with that, bruh. There’s no wonder Reshad Jones looked at him like he was crazy.

The Reggie Bush sighting was too short. I’m just gonna put that out there. Its nice to see that he and Chad have comeraderie (the two played video games before curfew) but ummmmmmmmmm, more Reggie, please?

The scrimmages are always a treat, especially for those of us who are good and ready for the first snap of the NFL season. There is the requisite pushing, shoving, and trash talk — tempers flare in that tropical heat and humidity.

And then, there’s the sexual innuendo, which has been absent on previous seasons. The show’s intro includes chicks in bikinis; at some point rookie tight end, Les Brown told his lady, she looked “hot” when she greeted him after camp, and the Dolphins cheerleaders made a scantily clad appearance, stretching and dabbing sweat. It’s Miami. What did you expect? Fellas, all that is for you.

Hard Knocks, Training Camp With The Miami Dolphins, which airs Tuesdays, at 10 PM ET, looks like its gonna be worth my $15.99 a month to DTV.

In case you missed the preview, have a look…

Miami Dolphins: Series Preview

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