Pat Williams Just … Went on … A Really Strict Diet … Yeah …

There were just a couple of raised eyebrows this weekend when the Minnesota Vikings opened their training camp up, especially when 37 year old defensive tackle and notorious large waisted man, Pat Williams, appeared in Mankato perhaps a few pounds lighter than fans remembered him being. “I’ve always been fast” he quipped to reporters and fans when he arrived last Friday, “But now I’ll be even fasta’ when chasin’ dose damn runnin’ backs waaay down afta’ dey dig past me.” However, when asked how he lost all of his weight, Williams appeared to dodge the question. “You’s plum have t’stay on some strict diet, man, no deep homey waffles covered in egg yolks and wrapped in bacon wrapped prosciutto. ‘S coo’, bro. I’m feedin’ da bud strictly strawberries, carrots, and lean meat when ah’ need mah’ protein. “Oh, and feedin’ da bud de **** out uh a banned dietary sup...