Originally written on Purple Jesus Diaries  |  Last updated 11/3/14

GREEN BAY, WI - JULY 28: General Manager Ted Thompson of the Green Bay Packers watches as his team works out during summer training camp on July 28, 2008 at the Hutson Center in Green Bay, Wisconsin. (Photo by Jonathan Daniel/Getty Images)


The Green Bay Packers are a young, stupid team that just won a Super Bowl. Ted Thompson, being a douche nose, probably takes full credit for all of this and thinks Jiggle-Jowls Mike McCarthy and Aaron Rodgers all did their jobs better because of his generalish managing skills. Thompson was also recognized by Sporting News as the 2011 Executive of the Year, even though he couldn't draft an offensive line to stop a Giants pass rush, or a defensive backfield that could stop a Flutie-Manning hail mary at the end of the game. Still, GREAT FOOTBALL MOVES, TED.

You know who is someone who ISN'T impressed by this nonsense? ... Besides me and a stern looking Zoe Saldana, of course? Rick Spielman, player personnel and general manager guru:

Look at how Rick has just SLAUGHTERED these recent draft picks, and you tell me that Ted Thompson is any better:



TED THOMPSON

Draft highlights include:
  • 2011, DB Davon House in the 4th round. Never heard of him. Probably dead.
  • Drafted James Starks in the 6th round of 2010. Big deal. He fumbled a repeat Super Bowl appearance away for the Packers. Great pick!
  • Defensive End Mike Neal, second round pick in 2010, is someone whom I have never heard of and assume is white. If you take a white player in the second round, TED, you better be damn sure he's a quarterback, coach, or offensive linemen.
  • Spent a sixth round pick on defensive back Brandon Underwood in 2009. What a steal! And a domestic violence charge! Amazing!
  • Spent another sixth round pick on Jarius Wynn, DE, in 2009. More like Jarius LOSE. Even Brad Childress could find a good sixth round pick if he had as many chances in one year as Ted Thompson did.
  • Matt Flynn, QB, 7th round pick in 2008 looks really good! Except that he's a QB from LSU, and Jamarcus Russell tells me those picks are fail-proof, so, good luck. Also, he's worse than Matt Cassel.
  • The Packers again had three 6th round picks in 2007. Desmond Bishop, LB, and Mason Crosby, K, stuck. Big effing deal. Korey Hall, FB, might have done something once in a blackout dream, but so did Greg Blue. You don't see me fluffing my nuts to that pick, TED.
Whatever. If this draft record can walk away with Executive of the Year at Sporting News, imagine what Rick Spielman is deserving of?



RICK SPIELMAN

Check THIS **** out:
  • Brilliantly used a sixth round pick in 2011 on a player from a college called "Slippery Rock." That's worth the page views your website will receive (plus the additional ad revenue!) from perverts searching for porn sites.
  • Opened the 2010 draft by trading back with a team in your division so they could get a solid running back while you eventually picked up a player who now has a history of wanting to murder people in Chris Cook? PSYCHED YOU OUT, DETROIT!!
  • 2010? A nice good-will move to the mentally handicapped community by drafting a retarded player in the second round in RB Toby Gerhart. Ted Thompson wouldn't do that. Ted Thompson hates retards.
  • Uh, only just picked our quarterback of the future in the SIXTH ROUND in 2010 in Joe Webb!!! I MEAN COME ONE!! The Packers had to waste a first round pick on Rodgers! Nerds!
  • Wisely used a 5th round pick in 2010 on Nate Triplett, building strong local relations and boosting moral in the city for a new stadium this government session.
  • A 7th round pick in 2010 on a Guido? Uh, easy move. Totally great move to play into the "Jersey Shore" hype. Ted Thompson things the Jersey Shore is an actual beach, he's so out of touch.
  • Five picks in 2009 netted Percy Harvin, Phil Loadholt, Asher Allen, Jasper Brinkley, and Jamarca Sanford. UH, THOSE ARE ALL STARTERS TOO, SPORTING NEWS??!!
  • Not much needs to be said here: 2008, mini-camp all star, WR, Jaymar Johnson. BEST. PLAYER. EVER.
What else needs to be said? While that nerd Ted Thompson received 2011's Executive of the Year award, Rick Spielman is clearly on the way to a lifetime achievement award, which is SOO much more revered. Stupid Packers, they'll never understand.

[follow]
MORE FROM YARDBARKER

Is Rampage Jackson heading back to the UFC?

WATCH: DeSean Jackson mocks Eagles after win

Michael Vick: Jameis Winston is the future of the NFL

Report: No NFL team is moving to Los Angeles in 2015

Report: 49ers looking for young, offensive mind as next coach

Sheldon Richardson: I'm on the same level as JJ Watt

LIKE WHAT YOU SEE?
GET THE DAILY NEWSLETTER:

Kendrick Perkins: Rajon Rondo wanted out of Boston

Report: Jim Harbaugh being encouraged to take Michigan job

Three quarterbacks who could be traded this offseason

Wolves trade Corey Brewer to the Rockets

Yankees trade Prado to Marlins for Eovaldi in 5-player deal

Brandon Browner fined $8K for throwing Brandon Gibson to turf

WATCH: Utah runs trick play on first offensive play of game

Mick Cronin misses game with unruptured aneurism

Steve Alford: Kentucky is best team I've coached against

Peyton Siva jokes that Rick Pitino is in the mob

WATCH: Montrezl Harrell ejected for throwing punch

UNC wearing Jordan-era throwback uniforms

Brian Kelly: Justin Brent gets 'distracted,' is in my doghouse

Five free agent signings that should happen in 2015

Reporter asks Rajon Rondo awkward question about trade

Video: Swaggy P elbows Steven Adams in throat, gets ejected

Video: Grizzlies buy car for assistant who had his stolen

Video: LeBron takes pass to the face from Dion Waiters

NFL News
Delivered to your inbox
You'll also receive Yardbarker's daily Top 10, featuring the best sports stories from around the web. Customize your newsletter to get articles on your favorite sports and teams. And the best part? It's free!

By clicking "Sign Me Up", you have read and agreed to the Fox Sports Digital Privacy Policy and Terms of Use. You can opt out at any time. For more information, please see our Privacy Policy.

WATCH: DeSean mocks Eagles

Vick: Winston is the future of the NFL

No NFL team in LA next season?

UNC rocking Jordan-era throwbacks

Reporter asks Rondo awkward question

Three quarterbacks who could be traded this offseason

Jon Lester and the Cubs

Report: NFL players used 'horny juice'

Top 10 worst NBA related commercials of all-time

Phelps gets probation for DUI

NFL coaches on hot seat in Week 16

The Roy Williams-Terrell Owens horse collar turns 10

Today's Best Stuff
For Bloggers

Join the Yardbarker Network for more promotion, traffic, and money.

Company Info
Help
What is Yardbarker?

Yardbarker is the largest network of sports blogs and pro athlete blogs on the web. This site is the hub of the Yardbarker Network, where our editors and algorithms curate the best sports content from our network and beyond.