Originally written on This Given Sunday  |  Last updated 12/14/11

Mark Sanchez, Jets, FLIRTATIOUS.
"Some days Mark Sanchez looks like Joe Montana, other days he looks like Hannah Montana." Dec. 8 Tweet by @WayneRadcliffe.

Will New York Jets fans ever make up their minds about Sanchez? Fans were prompted to cheer for Sanchez by former QBs Joe Namath, Chad Pennington and by Coach Rex Ryan. A few weeks back, he was everything that was wrong with the offense. Sanchez is 27-17 as the Jets starter, but he is like the nerdy boy friend of the hot Prom queen. She likes him for his nice guy qualities, but cannot forget her bad boy first live, Broadway Joe. You will do for now, Mark, baby.

Blaine Gabbert, Jaguars, MAYBE BABY.
"I'm not saying Blaine Gabbert is afraid of being hit, but I just poked him on Facebook and he slid." Dec. 6 Tweet by @PeytonsHead

We are in that early, nervous stage of exploring whether this relationship has a chance. You looked nice on the dance floor. Mama said I should be dating that nice Cam Newton or Christian Ponder. Do they have brothers at home? You can kiss me...on the cheek..., but that is no promise.

Rex Grossman, Redskins, COLD FISH
"Tom Brady is no Rex Grossman, but he's pretty good." Dec. 11 Tweet by @MikeWiseguy

Sexy Rexy won five of the 13 games he has started for the Redskins. That's as many wins as Donovan McNabb for the Redskins. Coach Mike Shanahan says Grossman is still under evaluation for 2012. It's the turnovers, isn't it? Do turnovers make me look fat in this dress? Mmm, yeah, they do.

Carson Palmer, Raiders, NAUGHTY
"BREAKING - In order to make this a good game again, David Stern just overturned the Carson Palmer trade." Dec. 11 Tweet by @FauxJohnMadden

We know this for what it is, a rebound relationship because my other partner is, um, not available. Now, we have seen you up close without make-up like Darren McFadden Red and Denarius Moore Blush, we understand that the dinner and flowers may have cost too much. This will last until it's over.

Sam Bradford, Rams, KISSABLE
"Through tonight, Sam Bradford has earned $40,464,588 in his NFL career." Dec. 12 Tweet by @darrenrovell  

I would never tell you this to your face, because it's not really your fault, but this isn't working out. My meter for you is dropping from True Love to dutiful kisses. Counseling can help save this marriage, counseling and more support from a few good linemen and more receivers than Brandon Lloyd. Please, take no offense if you catch me staring at my Andrew Luck pin-up. I still love you. No, really I do.

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