Originally written July 16, 2012 on Five Tool Tool:
Kansas_city_chiefs_fc79
Let He Who Is Without Rage Brandish The First Firearm10) Having road rage in Florida just means that you have a pulse9) Lying to the cops about having a gun is not, in fact, OK if you are crossing your fingers behind your back as you say it8) Without The Power Of The Tebow to guide them, all of the Broncos are powerless before Satan and his ways7) As Dumveril is 28 and an NFL player, he's only got about 2 to 4 more years before head trauma induced violent dementia anyway6) When one encounters traffic in Miami Beach on a Saturday night, it means that you are not getting your fair share of the fine fine ladies, which makes the brandishing of a firearm inevitable5) Dumervil was in the right lane, which is totally not his best position for getting off the line4) The guy he got into an argument refused to respect his level of, um, fame3) Rumors vary on this, but we have reason to believe there may have been a hoodie involved, which means everyone in the state was in their rights to s...
PLAYERS: Elvis Dumervil
TEAMS: Denver Broncos
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