Originally written on NorthWest Sports Beat  |  Last updated 11/8/14

ANAHEIM, CA - OCTOBER 30: Ryan Kesler #17 of the Vancouver Canucks looks on before a faceoff against the Anaheim Ducks during their game at the Honda Center on October 30, 2009 in Anaheim, California. The Ducks defeated the Canucks 7-2. (Photo by Harry How/Getty Images)
The Jeeves of Peeves

There is absolutely no doubt with regards to how much I and many fans like myself adore the Vancouver Canucks but you know what they say:

“Nobody’s perfect!”

Call me fickle and you may be right. Call me a realist and you would be even more right. There are flaws on this beauty of a squad and no I’m not talking about the mole on Ryan Kesler’s upper left thigh. Nor am I referring to Jannik Hansen’s Beaker-esque voice.

Actually, that one is kind of enjoyable, especially when Cory Schneider does an impression of it.

Anyways, I’ve thought about it and come up with my top five Vancouver Canucks pet peeves.

Maybe the Canucks needed Ehrhoff back to reach London. Storify.com

The Diving Team

Unfortunately, losing out in the first round ruled out any kind of qualification for the 2012 Olympics in London but at least they were in the running right? Look, this can really hard and we can argue about it or we can just all face the music and admit our team is bunch of puddle plungers.

It starts with Ryan Kesler’s antics vs. the Kings earlier this off-season. It extends to Alex Burrows, Max Lapierre and yes, even the Sedins. If you try to tell me they don’t dive, I will vehemently deny it because it’s just not true. It’s not fun hockey to watch and the desire to have it out of the Canucks’ game or hockey in general is unfortunately nothing more than a pipe dream.

Team Schneider vs. Team Luongo

Come on fans, this isn’t Twilight! Regardless of Roberto Luongo coming back for another season in Vancouver, this problem has plagued the organization’s landscape since the day Cory Schneider won his first NHL game (December 5th, 2008).

Nothing is ever good enough for this fanbase. Two all-star calibre goaltenders, both of which may represent their countries at the Olympics in 2014 and it’s still all about picking one. The salary cap story is just that, a different story, but that’s not what this is about. It boils down to the fickle fan (fickler than I).

The appreciation just isn’t there and frankly, it never will be.

One question though: Why can’t we just all be Canucks?

The Lack of Twaith is Disturbing

Andrew Gordon and Bill Sweatt notwithstanding, the Canucks rank in the bottom five teams for players who have a twitter account that fans and media alike KNOW 110% is the actual player. I don’t want to hear anyone tell me @strombone1 is Roberto Luongo.

The fact is that nothing has ever been confirmed.

Is @strombone1 really Roberto Luongo? We don't actually know. (Photo - VancouverSun.Com)

For the record, the four teams equal to or worse than Vancouver are Ottawa, New Jersey, Detroit and Boston. The reason this makes my list of pet peeves is because I think it’s important to have a bit more transparency between players and fans.

By transparency, I mean we can actually get a sense of a player’s personality whereas we probably aren’t going to get quite that kind of read just from a media scrum post-game.

It’s cliché after cliché in those cases and while that’s expected and not uncommon across the league, it also gets old after a while.

The Vancouver Canucks who I can attest to having one of the best social media teams in all of sports worldwide are failing at the player level.

Maybe 2012-13 is the year we see guys like Hamhuis, Burrows, Schneider, or even the Sedins sign up.

Costly Tickets

This problem is self-explanatory except for the part where it doesn’t just end at the amount one pays for a ticket. It is because of the ridiculously high prices we see the lower bowl filled largely with corporate suit types.

What can I say? It’s brutal to sit at home watching a Canucks game and notice the lack of atmosphere there is at Rogers Arena.

This is because said ‘suits’ either don’t give a crap about the game or don’t know a single thing about hockey.

The palpable lack of aura surrounding the bottom half of Rogers Arena is disturbing and its population kills the atmosphere worse than Buzz Killington.

This problem is also one that will probably never change. The crowd shouldn’t have to be directed to make noise or to clap their hands. Kevin Bieksa had it right earlier this season when he said:

“At times, we get that on the road when we’re in Phoenix or L.A., it seems we have a louder crowd than the home team, and I know it gets them down. When you’re at home and the road team has a louder crowd, it’s a little embarrassing.”

Fake Jerseys

This has to be my number one pet peeve. This one actually gives credit to the organization because they are trying to do something about it. One can go on Canucks.com and scour a page called ‘Fight the Fake.’

It’s quite brilliant and admirable if you ask me because counterfeit sweaters are running more rampant these days than Hulkamania.

Three words: Ugh and Ugh!

Why do fake jerseys bother me so much? Why can’t I just let a person be happy with what they’ve got? Well it’s mostly because the majority of fake jerseys I see are on TV adorned to people that are at games.

Logic tells me that if one can pay for a ticket to a game, you can pay to not look like an idiot.

Additionally, they are so easy to spot; the font, shoulder patches, logo, and the stripes. The world would be a better place if fake jerseys could be eradicated…just without the people who wear them in them during the eradication process.

It’s nothing personal of course.

More Vancouver Canucks coverage (funny and serious) is coming your way soon from the rest of the NWSB Staff and I. Stay tuned.


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Post tags: @strombone1, Alex Burrows, beaker, buzz killington, Canucks, Canucks fan base, Canucks fans, Canucks hockey blog, Cory Schneider, diving team, fake jerseys, Jannik Hansen, Maxim Lapierre, pet peeves, Roberto Luongo, Rogers Arena, Ryan Kesler, ticket prices, twitter, vancouver, Vancouver Canucks


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