Found April 13, 2012 on The Royal Half:
Los_angeles_kings_8605
We all have our roles here at The Royal Half Headquarters. I am the creative genius and driving force behind the site. Indiana Matt is the photoshop expert and in-house Midwestern Farm Boy. And the latest addition to our team, Brigitte from One Girl, One Puck, is the resident raging alcoholic. No, seriously guys... she really, really has a problem. We shouldn't make light of it one bit. So instead... we are going to let her make fun of it! So if you are watching at home or watching at an awesome Watch Party in Cerritos (where ever the hell that is!)... presenting, the Official Los Angeles Kings Playoff Drinking Game!!! The good thing is that you know Drew Doughty will always pick up the tab.
Cute white iPhone, Drew.  Click Here to Read How to Play the Los Angeles Kings Playoff Drinking Game!!!   I'm not a scientist or anything, but I think you might be doing it wrong. As any LA Kings fan can tell you sometimes a good drink is needed to get through a game. Let's face it, when you root for a team who's 30th 29th (woo!) in the league in scoring there's not too much to cheer about. So in order to get through the often exciting 1-0 hockey games, me and a few close friends have developed an entertaining way to get through the night. Now that this team is in the playoffs many of you may need this more than ever. Remember please play this drinking game responsibly, and by responsibly I mean by getting completely obliterated. THE RULES
  1. Pick out a drink of choice for the game. Whether it's beer, wine, or if you're going for the hard stuff, it's best to pick one beverage and stick with that all night.
  2. Pick out which things you're going to drink to. Start with just one and work your way into your alcoholism.
  3. Have fun, remember that's why you watch this STUPID TEAM!!!!!!!!
THINGS TO DRINK TO: 1) EVERY TIME DUSTIN BROWN FALLS ON HIS ASS
The Dustin Brown School of Skating has many pupils, but none can match the falling prowess of the founder.
  • Once if it's after a check or on a play with any type of contact.
  • Twice if he's diving.
  • Chug the whole thing if he's at least 5 feet away from anyone.
2) DRINK, EVERY TIME DREW DOUGHTY TURNS THE PUCK OVER "Oops. Wait I'm supposed to pass the puck to the guys in white? Sorry my bad."
  • Once if it's in the offensive zone.
  • Twice if it's in the neutral zone.
  • Three times if it's in front of the Kings net.
  • Chug the whole thing if it results in a goal against.
3) DRINK, EVERY TIME MATT GREENE LOSES HIS HELMET "I changed my helmet this year, the old one was falling off too much."
  • Take one drink the first time Matt Greene's helmet falls off.
  • Take one drink the second time Matt Greene's helmet falls off.
  • Take one drink the third time Matt Greene's helmet falls off.
  • Take one drink the fourth time Matt Greene's helmet falls off.
  • Take one drink the fifth time Matt Greene's helmet falls off.
  • Take one drink the sixth time Matt Greene's helmet falls off.
  • Take one drink the seventh time Matt Greene's helmet falls off.
  • Take one drink the eighth time Matt Greene's helmet falls off.
  • If you don't get the point by now... Matt Greene's helmet falls off a lot during the game.
4) DRINK, EVERY TIME A LA KINGS PLAYER MISSES AN OPEN NET Hockey 101: The puck goes in the net, not 10 feet high and wide.
  • Once if it's a forward.
  • Twice if it's a defenseman.
  • Three times if it's Dustin Brown.
  • Chug the whole thing if it's Dustin Penner.
  • Bonus drink if the other team has pulled their goalie.
5) DRINK, EVERY TIME JARRET STOLL TAKES A STUPID PENALTY Jarret Stoll's penalty was so stupid they just put Mike Richards in the box too.
  • Once if it's in the offensive zone.
  • Twice if it's within the first five minutes of the game.
  • Three times if it's within five minutes of the end of the game.
  • Chug the whole thing if the other team scores on the power play.
6) DRINK, EVERY TIME BOB MILLER AND/OR JIM FOX... "I think I'm going to just drink straight from the bottle Bob."
  • Say something about a player involving: 
  1. Playing against a former team.
  2. Playing against a former coach. 
  3. The University of Wisconsin.
  • Mess up a players name or number:
  1. Bonus if it happens more than once to the same player.
  2. Another bonus if a players name is completely made up. (i.e. David Brown instead of David Booth)
  3. Extra bonus if it's not Bob Miller who says it.
  • Say something about Jeff Carter's "Quick Release."
  • Jim Fox says "Whoa!"
SPECIAL BONUS DRINK TRIGGERS FOR OUR FRIENDS FROM THE NORTH WHO ARE WATCHING ON CBC!!!
(OR OUR U.S. FRIENDS WATCHING ON NBC SN) That's not a trash can he's throwing... it's filled with Molson Light.
  • Drink every time Coach Darryl Sutter's brothers are mentioned. 
  • Drink every time the Los Angeles Kings lack of scoring during the regular season is mentioned.
  • Drink whenever Jonathan Quick is mentioned as being a Vezina candidate.
  • Drink every time the announcers criticize a call against the Los Angeles Kings. 
  • Drink every time Dustin Penner scores the game winning goal on your team. In fact, if that happens again... you shouldn't stop drinking until the fall of 2012.
THE BACKYARD
BEST OF MAXIM
RELATED ARTICLES

Penner able to contribute when it matters most

Without having been on Southern California soil for eight hours after a 10-day roadtrip, Dustin Penner arose early on the morning of Feburary 13, a scheduled off day, to take part in a blogger-sponsored charity event at a local IHOP. A healthy scratch the two games in two nights prior, he was freshly removed from the American Airlines Arena roadtrip finale in which a pair of rookie...
DID THAT GO IN?

Announcer botches call of Kings goal

At the very end of the first period in Friday night's Canucks/Kings Game 2, Los Angeles captain Dustin Brown scored a shorthanded goal to give the Kings a 1-0 lead. At least, that was obvious to everyone at Rogers Arena except for CBC play by play man Jim Hughson. After a wild scramble in the front of the net, the puck comes to Brown who rifles a shot past Canucks goalie Roberto...

Kings sorry for wisecrack about Canucks

The Los Angeles Kings say they're sorry. One day after opening their playoff against the Vancouver Cancuks with a 4-2 victory, the Kings found themselves backtracking from a playful jab on Twitter. The team's official account posted a message saying: ''To everyone in Canada outside of BC, you're welcome.'' That didn't sit well with senior members...

Kings staying calm after 2 big wins in Vancouver

Dustin Brown is making sure the Los Angeles Kings don't get happy after a bit of early playoff success. Even after eighth-seeded Los Angeles stunned the Presidents' Trophy-winning Vancouver Canucks by taking the first two games of the first-round series, the Kings' captain realizes the historic obstacles in the way of a 44-year-old franchise that still has never lifted...

Kings cap win with another cheeky tweet

The Los Angeles Kings capped their second victory over the Vancouver Canucks with another cheeky post on their official Twitter account. ''We apologize in advance for anyone this tweet offends: LA Kings lead series 2-0,'' the Kings' social media team tweeted after Los Angeles won 4-2 on Friday night in Game 2 of the Western Conference series. After the Kings...

Brown helps Kings move to 2-0 vs. Canucks

Dustin Brown and the Los Angeles Kings got a lot more out of Vancouver's power plays than the top-seeded Canucks. Brown tied an NHL playoff record with two short-handed goals, Jonathan Quick made 46 saves and the Kings beat the Canucks 4-2 on Friday night to take a 2-0 lead in the first-round series. Brown had the two-goal game two nights after capping the Kings' 4-2 Game...

Kings score late to down Canucks

Dustin Penner scored with 3:14 left in the third period to help the Los Angeles Kings beat the Vancouver Canucks 4-2 in the opener of their Western Conference quarterfinal series Wednesday night. Penner had gone the last nine games of the regular season without a goal. The winger capitalized after Mike Richards' pass went off Jeff Carter's skate, and Penner whipped the puck...

Penner powers Kings to Game 1 upset of Canucks

Dustin Penner snapped a tie with 3:14 remaining in the third period as the Los Angeles Kings upset the Presidents' Trophy-winning Vancouver Canucks by a 4-2 score on Wednesday in the opener of their Western Conference quarterfinal series. Mike Richards recorded a goal and two assists, defenseman Willie Mitchell and captain Dustin Brown also scored and Jonathan Quick made 24...

The Kings Need The 2-0 Series Lead

The Los Angeles Kings won game one of the their Western Conference Quarterfinal match-up with the Vancouver Canucks, giving them the 1-0 series lead. Along with grabbing the series lead, the Kings stole the ever important home ice advantage from the Canucks.The Kings controlled a good amount of the game, and out shot the Canucks 39-26. If not for the stellar play by Roberto Luongo...

Los Angeles Kings apologize for tweet to Canucks

To everyone in Canada outside of BC, you're welcome.— LA Kings (@LAKings) April 12, 2012The Los Angeles Kings have apologized for their tweet made following their Game One win over the Vancouver Canucks. The tweet, "to everyone in Canada outside of BC, you're welcome", sparked a controversy but Kings vice president of communications and broadcasting, Mike Altieri...

Canucks' Bitz lowers boom on Kings' Clifford

Vancouver Canucks fourth-liner Byron Bitz was whistled for a boarding major and a game misconduct for his second-period hit on Kyle Clifford of the Los Angeles Kings on Wednesday. Clifford eventually exited the contest with an upper body injury for the Kings, who stunned the top-seeded Canucks with a 4-2 victory in Game 1 of their Western Conference quarterfinal series. There was...

All The Kings Men - Canucks: Game 2

The Million Dollar Nerdtet is back!!! Myself, Podcaster General Jesse Cohen, The Mayor John Hoven and Matt from Life In Hockeywood break down the Los Angeles Kings Game 2 victory over the Vancouver Canucks and whether or not Jesse will be healthy enough to make it to Game 3. Check it out here, subscribe to it on iTunes or you can listen below.

Game 2 Los Angeles vs. Vancouver – April 13th | NHL Highlights

Kings vs Canucks Game Recap Did you miss the Los Angeles Kings vs. Vancouver Canucks Friday night on Hockey Night In Canada? Boxscore | Q’s Post Game Recap We’ve got the highlights for you. Kings vs. Canucks highlights courtesy NHL.com. CLICK HERE CHECK OUT THE CANUCKS CLUBHOUSE TODAY AT NWSB! © NWSports "Q" for North West Sports Beat, 2012. | Permalink |...
NHL News
Delivered to your inbox
You'll also receive Yardbarker's daily Top 10, featuring the best sports stories from around the web. Customize your newsletter to get articles on your favorite sports and teams. And the best part? It's free!

Today's Best Stuff
For Bloggers

Join the Yardbarker Network for more promotion, traffic, and money.

Company Info
Help
What is Yardbarker?

Yardbarker is the largest network of sports blogs and pro athlete blogs on the web. This site is the hub of the Yardbarker Network, where our editors and algorithms curate the best sports content from our network and beyond.