Here we go again, slightly more on time this week and much more current. The Bound For Glory Series seems to have backfired on some of the TNA heels as they are getting less time to shine as it means more actual straight wrestling and for the most part less heel shenanigans, also the possible turn of Aries has got me questioning whether he should be in the chart at all, I guess it will just have to be a judgement call. So, let’s find out what that judgement was…
Weekly Top Ten:
1st Place: Mark Henry (10/10)
Apparently we are all just puppets, dancing a merry little jig. That is at least according to the World’s Strongest Man, and who is going to argue with him. Admittedly this week was pretty slow for heels but Mark Henry’s speech reinforced his actions last week and helped move his feud with Cena on a little bit more as we head towards Money in the Bank. Can Henry actually take the title from John Cena, not if we want a Cena vs. Bryan feud for Summerslam, but honestly, I wouldn’t mind seeing a re-hash of Henry vs. Bryan, in fact it would be a great look at just how far the two have developed from fighting over the World title to the WWE championship, and to be fair the two never had a real go at it the first time.
2nd Place: Mickie James (9/10)
That’s right it’s the Knockouts champion, in a week where most male heels were either sitting on their arses or sending mixed signals, Mickie James was talking trash in a passive aggressive style and defending her title like a good champion does, exploiting her foe’s weakness throughout the match. I am really enjoying Mickie James’ run as heel champion, while it is not exactly the main event of Impact it is at least something, although for once I can’t claim that it is more than the WWE as their thing with AJ and Kaitlyn is getting just as much attention, even if it is getting slightly lame at this point.
3rd Place: Bully Ray (8/10)
The TNA World Heavyweight champion keeps causing waves on Impact, constantly acting like he owns the joint and calling the shots within the Aces & 8s. In general I think TNA is doing pretty well when it comes to the long term booking of this angle, you can see it is all building up to something at Bound For Glory, unfortunately this long term booking means that things move at a rather slow pace…
4th Place: Austin Aries (7/10)
…That is until they pull a surprise out of the hat that calls everything we assume into question, this being the appearance of one Austin Aries under the mask of Suicide. I’m interested to see where this one goes since Sabin getting a shot seemed like a sure thing and now there is this curve-ball. There are two ways to look at it; either TNA didn’t think that Sabin would be a believable enough challenger (as being a ‘draw’ doesn’t count for much since the match would have taken place on a free TV show anyway) which to me is pretty short-sighted, or TNA is doing what they did with Bully Ray, leading us on with an obvious conclusion, swerving us so that we are all confused, and then actually going through with the original plans just in a slightly different and arguably better way. If this is the case then I am going with Sabin as managing to take the belt back off of Aries before Destination X, thus making him look more credible as a contender and potentially raising his profile even if he ends up losing to Bully Ray in the end. When it comes to Aries himself I decided to put him on the chart for his sneaky X Division title win, but not count his big reveal later in the night since none of that really felt all that heel, so while it might not be a full turn I am tentative in actually awarding him points for the segment, so he ends up in fourth place, which still isn’t so bad.
5th Place: Antonio Cesaro (6/10)
The experiment continues as Cesaro is further showing signs of being indoctrinated into the cult of Coulter (get it;) by spouting off general xenophobic gibberish. In a way it is a shame that Del Rio had to turn heel again already as he could have had an interesting feud with Cesaro at this point, and really I would like to see Del Rio out of the main event picture for a while because it just doesn’t seem to work, everything that guy does is pretty much unmemorable. I wouldn’t put it past the WWE to even go so far as to pair up Del Rio with Coulter himself, take that ‘positive example’ one step further and say that Del Rio has since proved himself to be a ‘Real American’ (perhaps by leading Swagger or Cesaro to the world title somewhere down the line). That actually wouldn’t be that bad, although for that to work there would have to be an available pool of foreign face talent for this stable (assuming Swagger has returned by this point) to work against.
6th Place: Ryback (5/10)
The rebuilding of Ryback has begun, I think it will take a long time before he earns back the ‘The’ before his name though , The Ryback was a force, the Ryback was unstoppable; Ryback is a chump. Sure he beat the Great Khali but so do most guys, just so long as they aren’t a jobber themselves. We’ll just have to see how he does against Jericho at Money in the Bank, as well as in the time before it.
7th Place: Dean Ambrose (4/10)
Things aren’t looking too good for the Shield right now as they have lost two times in the past three weeks as a team, which is unusual to say the least, what’s more this time was against a team much lower down on the ladder than many previous attempts. Perhaps there is dissention in the ranks, perhaps the secret to beating the team is tag team unity; after all the Usos are a team of twin brothers and Christian was one half of one of the best tag teams in the business and is a multiple time tag champ, or perhaps the WWE have just gotten tired of booking the shield as unstoppable. Whatever the case the loss itself probably won’t do much to hurt the team, what it did seem to hurt though is their power to put people over as while Bryan’s big win the other week helped to elevate him just that little bit more, I don’t feel like Christian’s win this week actually did much for him. Now maybe that is because of his status already, but I think it is more that beating the team, because it happened so close to the last time, has already lost its impact, and frankly that sucks big time.
8th Place: Alberto Del Rio (3/10)
The Mexican Aristocrat didn’t manage to have that grand a fiesta on Smackdown as for the most part it was ruined by yet another attack by Dolph Ziggler. I am really hoping that this face push for Ziggler works out, they just have to make him actually win against Del Rio, if not at Money in the Bank, then at Summerslam after some major shenanigans. In my opinion these shenanigans should go beyond Ricardo, a boot, a towel or even a bucket. To me what would sell Ziggler and his chasing the title into Summerslam would be if during their match at MitB, AJ and Big E came out, but instead of helping Ziggler, betrayed him, later claiming that it was for the money and perhaps even have AJ proclaim that she likes a man with gold (a bit generic for AJ I know but at this point her character is pretty much destroyed anyway), referring to Del Rio. This would make a Dolph Ziggler victory at Summerslam all the sweeter, and we could even get a realisation of the real romance that has been brewing for years in the WWE; Dolph Ziggler and Kaitlyn, you know you want it!
9th Place: AJ Lee (2/10)
Speaking of the nutty ninja, she was doing a bit of impersonating this week, which was pretty bad, but had some nice moments, such as in the muscle flexes and shots at Kaitlyn’s manhood. She did however also get beat in a match and speared out of her boots by a Kaitlyn-AJ lookalike to top it all off.
10th Place: Big E. Langston (1/10)
Langston comes in last, simply taking part in AJ’s skit on Raw; he probably wouldn’t have even made it into the chart if everyone else’s scores weren’t so low. I’m sure things will pick up, although that’s not what happened to Kaitlyn (*chortle*).
2013-2014 Season Top Ten:
1st Place: Bully Ray (59)
2nd Place: Mark Henry(54)
3rd Place: Dean Ambrose (53)
4th Place: The Ryback (52)
5th Place: Seth Rollins(52)
6th Place: Johnny Curtis (42)
7th Place: Roman Reigns (41)
8th Place: Damien Sandow (33)
9th Place: Dolph Ziggler (29)
10th Place: Mr Anderson (26)
(Heel Hall of Fame)
**Heel Report 2010-2011 Winner: The Miz**
**Heel Report 2011-2012 Winner: Cody Rhodes**
**Heel Report 2012-2013 Winner: C.M. Punk**
The Face-Off:The Miz Does Star Wars
He really should have learnt from the last time when Cena tried to work in comparisons to the franchise in his infamous promo last year, or even further back with the debut of the Shockmaster; Star Wars and wrestling just don’t mix. There is only lame-ness to be found.
Face the Facts:Daniel Bryan is Woody Allen
While on commentary Bryan was great, all happy about his victory over Orton but then full of self-doubt if Kane could also then beat the Viper, will this self-doubt lead to a heel turn leading into a feud with John Cena or can the WWE handle a face vs. face feud between the two at the biggest event of the summer? It would be pretty epic; IWC vs. Cenation, the epitome of WWE thinking vs. the Indy darling, and what if Bryan won?! Crazy times man.
On the Rise: The History of Punk and Heyman
This was just great storytelling, and what’s more it was all about shades of grey, just like the interactions between Ziggler and Jericho. Somehow someone back there seems to be saying ‘well we will put it all out there and the fans can decide how they actually feel about it’, again crazy times man.
Flat-Footed:Young and Titus Assault
This **** was just plain sloppy, they tried to double-team Punk so as to give the excuse of Axel having to come out to help him but honestly it looks like Punk wouldn’t have really had any trouble since the two were slipping and sliding around the ring like it was an oil slick, what the hell happened?
That’s all for this week, shorter ‘Weekly Filler’ but still a decent amount of rant-age going on, certainly more than last time, and as I said more ‘on time’ than before. Come back next time when hopefully I will get things done by the weekend, shocking! For now though, this is James Wright signing off.