Originally written on Five Tool Tool  |  Last updated 11/19/14
Toodles, Cheater Boy 10) After this shocking fall from grace, the only thing that Braun has left is a contract worth tens of millions of dollars, and a local fan base that will mark out for him if he, well, hits next year when he returns9) Being forced to miss the last 65 games of the 2013 Brewers season really seems like cruel and inhuman punishment, really, no, seriously8) Before everyone marks out for how Matt Kemp Wuz Robbed for Braun's MVP year, maybe we need to take a second look at Kemp's nonstop recent injury history7) You will be shocked, shocked to learn that Braun probably made all of his sleazy connections while in, surprise, surprise, The Great State Of National Embarrassment That Is Florida6) Braun says that he realizes now that he's made some mistakes, the chief of which was being an inveterate liar and cheat5) The announcement made everyone stop pretending to care about the Matt Garza trade4) Braun's scandalous behavior will finally give America's racists the excuse...
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