Found January 05, 2012 on The Onion:
PLAYERS: Andrew Luck
TEAMS: Stanford Cardinal
GLENDALE, AZ—Stanford quarterback and projected No. 1 NFL draft pick Andrew Luck spent the majority of his post–Fiesta Bowl interview Tuesday night discussing the superb health and dexterity of his neck.

Luck or Griffin III: Predictions On Who Should Be The Number One Draft Pick?

Well its official, college football is nearly done for the season but the talk of it is far from done. The 2012 Draft is not all that far in the distance. In fact its only 4 months away. Its quite a safe prediction to assume that the talk will be non stop between now and then, and not a single day will pass that different ideas wont be thrown around like a writer who is brainstorming...

Report: Colts to select QB Luck first overall

The Indianapolis Colts are reportedly prepared to select quarterback Andrew Luck with the first overall pick in the upcoming NFL draft.Sources close to the team tell ESPN that the Colts have no intention of passing on the chance to nab luck, even with franchise quarterback Peyton Manning still in the fold.Luck had an outstanding season with Stanford, throwing for more than 3,500...

Cardinal Sin: Stanford Should've Relied More On Luck

A BCS game on the line, a vaunted rushing attack, the most hyped quarterback in years is under center...and you put it in the hands of a nervous freshman kicker?  For shame, Stanford. A school known for its smarts showed us the dumb last night, and the stench could linger in Palo Alto for some time. They had Oklahoma State on the ropes. They had the perfect ending to a game, a...

How Andrew Luck and Robert Griffin III Could Ruin Your Draft Day Fun

Twelve teams are alive for the NFL Playoffs. While fans of the also-ran and never-were teams look forward to the sports entertainment value of the NFL holiday season, do you think they will be engaged? Um, no. Those fans will stress over how the home team can get better in a hurry. That means they will focus on the 2012 NFL Draft this April. Draft Day is the third most anticipated...

The Andrew Luck Sweepstakes, Vol. VIII: With a Whimper

At one point early in this past Sunday's loss to the Jacksonville Jaguars, the Indianapolis Colts defense was backed up on its own one yard line. Third-and-goal from the one, the Jaguars would surely get in. But for once, the Colts D held its ground. For some bizarre reason, the Jags (perhaps thinking points would be at a premium) decided to go for it on fourth down only to get...

College Football 2012: What We've Learned

As the bowl season comes to a close, it’s crazy to think the season is already over.   Kind of sad, really, thinking of Monday’s game, then the NFL playoffs, then all the baseball and basketball we have to endure before hearing the words ‘two-a-days’ or ‘Football Preseason Rankings’.  Until then, I’m making a conscious effort to become a smarter football fan by...

Colts “won’t pass” on Andrew Luck

By all accounts, Indianapolis is fully expected to get Luck-y in April, making the now-former Cardinal a Colt with their top draft choice. Now there’s further confirmation that the highly-touted signal-caller is likely headed to Indy — be it as an understudy or successor. ESPN’s Chris Mortensen believes the Colts “won’t pass” on selecting quarterback Andrew Luck with...

We have our first ‘Robert Griffin III over Andrew Luck’ voice

And that voice belongs to Tony Dungy, former head coach of the Indianapolis Colts and current NBC analyst. Luck has been assumed to be the top overall pick in the 2012 NFL draft since shortly after his birth in 1989. He's been called a can't-miss prospect, the best quarterback prospect to come along in a decade, and a franchise savior. But now, we have the first signs that...

Losing does not mean Sam Houston St. is not Better

In college football that people say matters (playoffs?) but in fact has no meaning to the sports world, #2 North Dakota State upset #1 Sam Houston St. in their first Division I FCS football championship win. Don't tell that to one mysterious Sam Houston St. player because, according to this picture, he is not taking the loss well and may want to show that finger or fist into...

Arizona State quarterback Brock Osweiler enters NFL draft

Arizona State quarterback Brock Osweiler has announced that he will forego his senior season and enter the 2012 NFL draft. Osweiler becomes the second quarterback to announce his intentions to leave school with a year of NCAA eligibility remaining, following Stanford’s Andrew Luck. Baylor’s Robert Griffen III is also expected to announce that he’s turning…

Barry Sanders Commits to Stanford

No Andrew Luck? No problem. Stanford is reportedly set to introduce its next big name college football player this weekend. Barry J. Sanders is expected to announce his intention to accept a scholarship to play running back on the Farm. If the name sounds familiar, you're not alone. Barry J. Sanders is the son of NFL Hall of Fame running back Barry Sanders. The former Detroit...
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