In a story every bit as surprising as Alex Sanchez doing steroids or Marcus Giles being heterosexual, word just broke that Ne!fi Perez has been suspended for testing positive for stimulants. From the AP story: "The Office of the Commissioner of Baseball announced on Friday that infielder Neifi Perez of the Detroit Tigers has been suspended 25 games, effective immediately, for testing positive for a banned Stimulant in violation of Major League Baseball's Joint Drug Prevention and Treatment Program." So that's how he got the exclamation point in his name. Drugs. You see what drugs get you, kids? A .172 batting average, that's what. If you're looking for fantasy advice based on the news because Perez is your starting shortstop, congratulations: your name is Dusty Baker.