Originally written January 28, 2013 on IT IS HIGH, IT IS FAR, IT IS caught:
The thinking fan ponders every news event and political issue with one fundamental concern: How does this affect our Yankees?For example, take gun control. If the national yogurt-tofu squat-to-pee crowd bans our Second Amendment assault weapons, how will Jete ever again sleep securely? I figure he always doses while spooning a loaded piece, and I'm not referring to aerobics instructors. Good grief, if he wasn't known as "El Capitan," John Sterling could call him "The Bushmaster." Take away his firearms, and Jete's BA could plunge 20 points. Then again, what if some aspiring supermodel wakes up in the middle of the night, fingers the wrong gun and goes Claire Danes on our hero? Then we're looking at Eduardo Nunez. It's complicated.But there's nothing complicated about picking the Yankee-friendly winner of the 2013 Super Bowl.Baltimore. We need the Rave-Ons to win. Why? For starters, in the post-game dignitary parade, Ray Lewis will kill som...
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