Found February 12, 2013 on IT IS HIGH, IT IS FAR, IT IS caught:
PLAYERS: Bruce Willis
TEAMS: New York Yankees
Friday is Asteroid Day in America. Top scientists say a bus-sized chunk of rock will miss the earth by about 15 minutes, closer than anything since we developed the abacus and started tracking them. It's a "city killer" (Abe Beam wasn't the only one.) If the chunk hits Atlanta, everybody's a Flame. If it hits Denver, everybody's a Nugget. If it hits Boston, everybody's a-brewin'... aww, fergitit. The official word is: Don't worry, everybody, it will miss Earth.Which is exactly what they'd say if it's heading our way.We've seen this movie. We know the deal. The authorities fear mass riots. They don't want a zombie apocalypse. There was a Charles Bukowski poem where the world ends, he grabs a woman, rips off her dress, and the last line of humanity goes something like, "I shoved it in." The Army doesn't want this. We need to maintain orderly lines at Walmart. (But don't shop at Target, heh heh, get it? Awww....) S...
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