Someone might want to check the rims at the Rose Garden. Just 10 days after the Blazers set a dubious NBA record by missing all 20 of their three-point attempts in a win over Toronto, the Nuggets have broken it in the very same building. On the eve of the apocalypse, Denver went an astonishing 0-22 from beyond the three-point arc, but that’s not all. Until the 38-second mark of the fourth and final quarter, the Nuggets had not scored a single field goal from outside the paint. It was Ty Lawson who finally made Denver’s first and last jumper of the evening, preventing them from going 0-32 beyond the painted rectangle. Unbelievably, the Nuggets were able to remain competitive throughout the game. Despite Portland’s 14 three-pointers made, Denver lost by just eight (101-93). I first checked in on this game in the middle of the third, when Denver was something like 0 for 15 or 20 from outside the paint and 0-10 or 15 from three. By the time Ty Lawson made his top-of-the-key jump shot with 38 seconds to go, I was holding my breath every time a Denver Nugget prepared to launch from the perimeter. Naturally, I was fascinated by the fact that an NBA basketball team could even have a realistic chance to go 0-everything from outside the paint, and I wanted to see what probably would’ve been an all-time first. I obviously can’t prove that no team has ever failed to score from outside the paint, but I can tell you this: since ’06/07, the record for fewest made shots from outside the paint was four. Denver didn’t even come close to that mark. Quite honestly, I can’t even begin to imagine watching a professional team shoot the ball worse than Denver did on Thursday night. It’s not like the Blazers were blocking these perimeter shots — hell, a handful of them weren’t even contested at all. Multiple Nuggets had WIDE-OPEN looks at the basket, yet it took 47 minutes and 22 seconds for a single one of their jumpers to find the bottom of the net. I’ve never seen anything like it, and I was one of about five people who actually watched that Portland/Toronto game where the Blazers went 0-20 from three. The NBA, where amazing happens.