Originally written on Barry Melrose Rocks  |  Last updated 11/14/14

Enjoy it while you can, America. The Phoenix Coyotes are on TV. And they still exist, which is also remarkable. I hope everyone successfully navigated the holiday and a week without much by way of posts here at BMR. I, nor Loser Domi are machines. But now I am back, and ready to encourage binge drinking once again.
The question I have for almost anyone that has ever said that hockey doesn't belong in Phoenix... have you ever BEEN to Phoenix? It's warm and sunny ALL THE TIME. Sure, you can't really play pond hockey to build your local talent or anything, but dammit, Phoenix is amazing. This has to be the reason the Coyotes are still there, so Edmonton gets a trip to Arizona every once in a while. It just makes sense.


DRINK

... along with the meal you and Viktor Stalberg made.

... while trying to figure out where the Coyote's logo history rates in the annals of Cubism

... when Ray Whitney, Daymond Langkow, Derek Morris, Adrian Aucoin or Shean Doan touch the puck. Arizona IS for old people.

... if, along that same thread, Sean O'Donnell starts to physically rot on ice. Multiple drinks, depending on which limbs fall off first. You can make your own house rules!

 DRINKING PLAYER OF THE WEEK: Martin Hanzal!
 

As a known lothario, I can tell you that the ladies love nothing more than a Middle Ages peasant with peroxide blond hair. What do they say at  talk-sports?

Well, it really all just comes down to this statement, addressed specifically to Martin Hanzal's girlfriend, allegedly named Lenka, who, for whatever Godforesaken reason reads the talk-sports forums, apparently...

"Seriously, out of all the guys on the team i would never think martin would ever cheat. He is such a sweetheart and he seems to be really happy with his girl. And Lenka if you are checking up on this dont waste your time with angry people who are jealous that you got the boy. "

 Well, that and this
"heard he likes man, man woman 3somes" 

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