Originally written on The Royal Half  |  Last updated 11/16/14

Game #18/19

LA Kings
(8-6-3, 17th in NHL)
vs
Anaheim Ducks
(6-8-3, 26th in NHL)

Wednesday, 7:30pm, Staples Center
Los Angeles, CA

Thursday, 7pm, Honda Center
Anaheim, CA 

BEST RUSSIAN TO PLAY FOR EITHER TEAM:

This is the 2nd best photo of Alex Frolov and Sergei Fedorov playing against each other on the internet.
This is the 1st. 

BEST OPPOSITION BLOGS:
Battle of California
Anaheim Calling

BEST RUSSIAN BLOGS:
From Russia With Glove
English Russia

As you've all heard by now, Dustin Penner and Alec Martinez are on the IR and have been replaced by the cheaper and more efficient labor of Russians. With both Andrei Loktionov and Slava Voynov heading to Los Angeles from Manchester, I haven't seen this many Russians invading the West Coast since Red Dawn. After Alex Frolov, the Kings history of young Russian players (sorry, Alex Ponikarovsky) doesn't run all that deep. Names like Vitali Yachmenev, Denis Grebeshkov and Maxim Kuznetsov are the most talented young Russians that have come through the Kings system. But let's be honest here... I mean, most Russian players don't even want to play in Los Angeles. 

They just don't have the same quality borscht in LA that they do in Newark.

But this is Hollywood, after all. And when producers see a young hot commodity that everyone is talking about, there is only one thing to do... get them into a movie! 

"Bobby Ryan... I must break you."

Of course, as a producer, in order to get the best performance from your actors... you might have to dig deep into their personal lives and see how willing they are to have their daily conflicts portrayed on the big screen. That's why I think Andrei Loktionov and Terry Murray are perfect for the remake of a late 1980s buddy action flick!

Surprisingly enough, Terry Murray's had a more successful movie career than Jim Belushi.

Since this is the first time that Slava Voynov and Andrei Loktionov will be playing together in Los Angeles... perhaps they are more suited for a role in a classic, fish-out-of-water, buddy comedy that honors their Russian heritage?

"Doctor."

Maybe these exciting, young players are exactly what a tired, old franchise needs?

One thing is for sure. Just in case these Russian boys get out of line and disrespect the amazing country that they will be playing hockey in... the Kings have one man that can set them straight on how to be a Proud American.

Either Jim Fox just ordered the American Meat Lovers from Dominos...
or he's about to open a square box of whoopass on Voynov and Loktionov.

Most movies featuring young stars cashing in on a pop culture presence usually tank at the box office. So maybe the Los Angeles Kings are taking the right approach when it comes to getting the faces of their new Russian stars all over the streets of Los Angeles.

Well at least it's catchier than the Kings last ad campaign.

I, for one, am excited to see what the Russian Revolution brings to the Los Angeles Kings. And as for the uproar over Andrei Loktionov playing on the left wing instead of his natural center? Well, just remember... Scott Parse scored 2 more goals as Mike Richards' left wing than Dustin Penner has. So I'll take my chances with Loktionov. 

"I fight to win for me, for me!"

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