Found April 07, 2012 on
The Show Speak:
Albert Pujols is hitless (in large part due to the mastery of China-manian Bruce Chen) as an Angel and the St. Louis Cardinals are undefeated without their former MVP slugger.
This is the worst possible start to the season for those that are envious of the St. Louis Cardinals baseball franchise (see Cub fans), and the best possible outcome for goober* Cardinal enthusiast that thought "them, there Cardinals don't need that selfish, overpaid, greedy, past his prime Pujols."
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace; font-size: xx-small;">Photo by Craig Turley - Tempe Diablo Stadium
Fortunately, for everyone else in the world that has a full set of teeth, and the desire to complete full sentences on a regular basis without spitting Red Man chewing tobacco every other word - it's only one game - and that game meant the completion of opening day games in major league baseball.
It will get better for Pujols. The China-manian** pitching phenom Bruce Chen will continue to amaze, the Cardinals will eventually lose a game, and the Cubs will continue to be the only team or individual referred to as a disaster.
Now, that's a winner.
Until Next Time,
*Please recognize the amount of sarcasm insinuated in this article.
**Bruce Chen is a Panamanian born pitcher for the Kansas City Royals of Chinese descent.
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