Last weekend during the UFC Fan Expo, several of the organization’s top fighters hosted Q&A sessions for fans. Amongst the Q&A sessions was loquacious Chael P. Sonnen, who offered fas his standard ”shtick” and discussed topics such as his upcoming fight with Shogun Rua and what he will demand from UFC President Dana White in his next UFC contract.
The list of demands looks something like this:
1. Jello Biafra replaces Bruce Buffer as ring announcer.
2. Every fight I am in must be a No. 1 contender fight or a title fight. If I lose, I get an immediate rematch until I win.
3. No media can look me in the eye or they will be removed from the room.
4. Headset legalized through the commission, so I can call my own fights.
5. No longer will I walk to the ring, I need to be carried.
6. Keys to your least favorite Ferrari.
7. I can Skype or Facetime my fights if I don’t feel like flying.
8. Tell GSP to quit being such a dick; I’ll return his truck when I’m done with it.
While it is h...