Originally written on Celtics Town  |  Last updated 11/8/14

Lil’ Wayne once said he woke up in the morning, ashed his blunt in his grammy award, looked into the mirror and told the man staring back, “You’s an ill n****.”

Well, I woke up this morning, drank a glass of water, read the Boston Herald, looked into the mirror and saw a smidgen of vomit trickling down my chin because JEFF GREEN JUST GOT PAID $36 MILLION OVER FOUR SEASONS, PEOPLE!! (Boston Herald)

Agent David Falk, who said Friday an agreement with the Celtics on Jeff Green’s contract should come early this week, clearly is pleased with how talks have progressed. Green agreed to a one-year, $9 million contract with the team last December, but the discovery of an aortic aneurism during a physical voided the contract.

Falk returned to the same starting point this month and got his wish.

The new deal, again starting at $9 million, will be worth $36 million over four years, according to a source.

No kidding, David Falk is pleased with how talks have progressed. His client — who is coming off heart surgery, hasn’t played a real basketball game since May 11, 2011, and cracked double figures (with 11 points) once in nine playoff games for the Boston Celtics — will earn $9 million per season for each of the next four years.

There’s a chance Green develops to the point of deserving his contract. He’s a 25-year old with All-Star talent and the versatility to play both forward positions. Doc Rivers even played him some at shooting guard in 2011. But Green has never even had a league-average PER. He doesn’t rebound well for his position, isn’t a very good defender, and THE CELTICS ARE NOW PLAYING THEIR BACKUP SMALL FORWARD $36 MILLION OVER THE NEXT FOUR YEARS!

Green’s team’s routinely perform better when he’s off the court. He was overrated in Oklahoma City because his per-game statistics were inflated by big minute totals. People want to give him a pass for his half-season in Boston because he couldn’t adjust to playing with three Hall of Famers, or whatever, but his per-minute stats were almost exactly the same with Boston as they were in each of his seasons with the Thunder. I don’t know whether to scream or cry or run directly to Danny Ainge’s house with a brick in one hand and a pack of matches in the other.

The jury is still out, of course. I’m hoping Green turns himself into an All-Star and makes me look dumber than Skip Bayless. But all the evidence we have to date shows that Green is unworthy of such a big, long-term deal.

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