Create-a-Caption: Alfonso Soriano's unlikely new fan club

Given his performance at the plate (one homer in August) and misadventures in the outfield, you might think that Alfonso Soriano(notes) doesn't have a friend within Chicago's city limits. However, as these two fine White Sox fans can attest, that's simply not true. So have at it, amateur Internet copy editors of the world. How should this caption read? Follow the jump for winners from Wednesday's C-a-C featuring new friends in Colorado: 'But the A's said you were cold to the touch' 1st — JJ. "I once took steroids too, son. Unfortunately, I injected them into my lower lip."2nd — JerBear50. "Nice job today, son. Just so we're clear, if you so much as THINK about swinging at a pitch, we'll dump you out at Mile High in a Cutler jersey."3rd — Dan D. "Son, up here we keep our bananas firmly wrapped up. I don't want yours swinging in any hammocks now, you hear?"HM — Allen. "Trust me Jaso...